What if completion isn’t about being finished?
This week my sense of home was disrupted.
While "home" can represent a lot of things- from our country to our neighborhood or even our own body- in this case it was my apartment.
There were new pipes running through rooms, continually fluctuating timelines, a few unexpected frustrations… and what felt like a lot of waiting. My schedule was at the mercy of the electricians.
As everything unfolded, I noticed how often my nervous system was looking for the finish line.
Once they’re done...
Once everything is back where it belongs...
Once I know there aren’t any more delays or surprises....
Then I’ll settle.
But life often doesn't give us those neat endings (despite what Hallmark movies tell us).
Plans change.
Projects spill into another day.
Someone forgets the one thing they promised to bring.
Something random somehow disappears in the process.
As I was in one of those in between moments, I realized I didn’t want to have to wait for everything to be complete before I could feel coherent.
What’s the difference?
Completion is external.
Coherence is internal.
Completion says, “Everything is finally back to normal.”
Coherence says, “I can still feel like myself, even while things are unfinished.”
For me, that meant relishing in the mundane.
✔️Not foregoing my workout even if it wasn't on my usual schedule.
✔️Making meals for myself and actually being present when I sat down to eat them.
✔️Accepting that my apartment—and my week—weren’t going to feel exactly like they usually do.
As we head into the Fourth of July weekend, it makes me think about how often we tie our sense of freedom to external circumstances.
Maybe another kind of freedom is possible.
The freedom that comes from discovering you don’t have to wait for life to feel completely settled before you can begin to feel settled within it.
