3 false beliefs you have about stress

May 8

Stress and mental wellbeing are intimately connected.

This may seem like a no brainer, but the way that stress impacts the mind might not be quite so obvious.

When we're stressed, or more specifically when our stress response is activated, we are in survival mode.

When we're in survival mode our mind only has the ability to focus on fear and the mindsets and emotions that fall under that umbrella of fear. Things like...

Lack
Feeling the victim
Blaming others
Judgement
Criticism
Rumination
Not enough (having enough or being enough)

We need (and want) our stress response for our survival so the answer is not to eradicate stress from our lives.

I would even argue that more often than not stress can actually be a good thing. (Keep reading, we’ll talk about how and why)

And it’s possible to have a positive relationship with stress and even use it to your advantage.

Here are 3 false beliefs you have about stress…

and the simple perspective shifts you can implement RIGHT NOW to create a positive relationship to stress and support better mental wellbeing

Mistake #1:Assuming all stress is the same

We often lump a lot of things under the category of stress, when in truth we mean many different things.

For example:

Our Stress (response): A normal reaction the body has when changes occur, resulting in physical, emotional and intellectual responses

The stress response happens very quickly when our survival brain is triggered, but once the trigger ends, so does the response.

Then we have:

Distress: Negative stress having negative effects on the body and brings about emotions like anxiety or overwhelm

Stressful events or situations can be either positive or negative (more on that in Mistake #2), but they turn into distress when they are chronic and in some way a constant threat and uncertainty.

It’s these types of stressors that we want to focus on getting some relief from the most in order to support our mental wellbeing.

How do we do that? Read Mistake #2.

Mistake #2: Seeing stress as a bad thing

There is also a type of stress called eustress.

Eustress: a positive form of stress having beneficial effects on health, motivation, performance and emotional well-being.

We would often think of these as being things like getting a job promotion, training for a marathon, traveling to a new place. Why do we look at them this way?

Because they are challenging us to grow, learn or strengthen a skill or expand our capabilities in some way. Often in ways that we desire.

What if distress is actually just eustress masquerading underneath discomfort?

Any growth or stressor is always uncomfortable in some way. If it’s happening in a situation we desire, we just have a higher tolerance for discomfort because the benefit we believe to be on the other side of that discomfort is something we want.

The truth is, everything is always happening FOR us.

If we start to look at the distressful situations in our lives in the same way we think of the beneficial challenges as eustress, we can start to reframe our distress and begin to see the chances for growth, learning and expansion, turning what was previously only a negative situation into one with positive aspects as well.

Mistake #3: Not differentiating stress and anxiety

We often talk about stress and anxiety interchangeably.

Anxiety is often triggered by stress and in truth shares many of the same symptoms. But anxiety is when we’re stuck in those symptoms and a sense of fear or worry even though there is not actually a stressful event happening in the present.

When we’re in a state of anxiety, we’re living in some sort of future unknown. We’ve disconnected from our body and most of the energy in the body is centered in the head and in our mind that is working overtime with the anxious thoughts. We’ve stopped being present.

We can reduce our current stress by re-presencing ourselves in the here and now, which will help get our mind out of the anxiety loop.

I would love to hear which mistake resonated with you the most. Share in the comments below.

Here’s to creating a positive relationship with stress and cheers to celebrating your stress for the growth opportunities it provides!